I started off the New Year right. I started it jobless. That’s right folks. I quit!
Sounds exciting but quitting didn’t turn out quite the way I imagined. Rather than submitting my resignation with a heroic shove to the shocked and disappointed expression of my supervisor, I slipped my notice quietly, sneaking out the back door relatively unnoticed by coworkers.
And rather than driving into the sunset with a cocky grin and the fervor to take on a brave new world, I retreated to the womb of my living room couch and lay there for almost a week in a zombie-like stupor while the movie “Office Space” played on repeat in the background. Yikes! Okay, so it wasn’t that bad, but it was close.
Gratefully, the stupor has worn off, and I feel human again. And with my reentry into the human race, my desire to create and inspire through a life of honesty and transparency has been reborn! Voilà!! I give you… a new post!
I know. Not that exciting, but what is exciting is that, today, I felt something I haven’t felt in several years: spontaneous joy.
Here is how it happened. I was driving in my little beat up Corolla, making a turn onto the freeway, when I glanced at my dog who was sitting shot-gun. Her glossy black fur bounced with sunlight and suddenly the feeling washed over me–pure, bright, heart-tickling joy.
For no particular reason.
I hadn’t thought any happy thoughts. In fact, my mind was pretty empty. At one moment I was in a state of wordlessness and next there was joy. It lasted for only 15 seconds, but it was enough to affirm that despite all my worry, fear and doubt, I am making good choices. I’m getting closer to happiness, baby step by baby step. Fabulous!
A Fresh Start
So, now it’s time to do a little housekeeping, both mentally and physically. Since my time is all my own, it would be incredibly easy to fritter it all away and have nothing to show for myself two months from now. Although, I had given up goals for a period of time (details to be provided in another post), I’ve decided to reclaim them. Right now I simply need firm, solid goals to keep me grounded.
My first goal is to sell all my belongings except: my computer, phone, kindle, desk, lamp, guitar, keyboard, sewing machine and mannequin, clothing/shoes, purse, wallet, a few select books and kitchen items, my bicycle,
my car, my dog and a few plants. Sounds doable. I let you know how it goes.
Finally, you might be wondering “Lindsey, did you make any New Year’s Resolutions for 2012?” The answer is yes. While I’ve already adopted a few lifestyle changes with the beginning of the year (more details to come) they really are only a by-product of the one New Year’s Resolution that I’ve fully committed to.
I resolve to stop compromising my principles and instead make choices that foster and support my deep-seated values. In other words, I choose Happiness.
Hope you are happy and healthy in the new year. I missed you.